• 100% of all bottled water was once in an elephant's urinary tract.

• Bottled water contains live sperm, capable of rendering you pregnant.

• If a fire is put out by urine, bears will be attracted to it and eat the dirt and ash left behind.

• Ashley's feet fit nicely around my sweaty balls.

• Bottled water contains dikc.

• All bottled water contains flouride, a toxin that will lower your IQ!

• Dikc.

• Bottled water contains dirty Holy Water.

• I would smell Ashley's feet and get a hardon. No lie.

• If You Die in Canada You Do NOT Die in Real Life.

• Bottled water is really spit.

• Bottled water smells like a pe nis.

• Bottled water makes airline representatives change ticket prices every 12 hours.

• Wha?

• MORE BOTTLED WATER MEANS MORE DIAPERS FOR BABBY.

• "the gov't must become small enough to drown in a bottle of water" -g. noquist.

• I wanna smell ashley judd's feet too. can i become a republican?

• THE TAP IS THE TI T OF THE NANNY STATE! WASH YOUR CAR AND SPRINKLE YOU LAWN iN BOTTLED WATER.

• Our troops in the sandbox drink gallons of BW and they are the most American Americans ever!

• "BOTTLE SOME WATER FOR JESUS TODAY!".